skyline, be mine

inspired by the song by Shura

things weren’t always so numbing, you know. there was a time when buildup was thrilling, shocking, and stars— it was dizzying. hopeful. you felt transcendence as he held your hand in his, dragging you up to some grandiose staircase to have a chat. in private. heart pounding, body exhilarated with sweat and the inability to meet his eyes as your mind roamed all of the possible outcomes. 

you had never seen it like this before, the mutuality of it all. it was just some dream, impossibility always rang at the hum of any sort of suggestion that it may be true. but here he was, rubbing that sweaty palm of yours, and you realized you missed it. 

you missed everything— only catching a glimpse of the past ten minutes when he sat there, wine in his hand sharing a shade with his cheeks, and it suddenly didn’t seem oh-so-unattainable as it did an hour ago. nothing had ever moved past a simple touch or tease, but there he was, toying with you. he had to know, he had to see what you’ve secretly fantasized about this whole time. if he did know, he was playing along. one thing led to another; maybe he upset you, maybe he teased a little too hard only injuring the fragility that he gave you.

“no, no, you’ve gravely misunderstood,” he reassured you. “please come back upstairs with me, there is much i wish to tell you.”

the note he paused on left your mind roaming with the good and the bad, but the giddy bubbles in your stomach were much more prominent. after that, every single word that came out of his mouth was like a new wave of realization. a new churn in your stomach. his blue eyes were sincere, and you watched that sincerity turn from admiration to dark and lust blown—yet safe. that first touch to your thigh. you never thought this would actually happen. it’s a dream.

your walk home felt different, body warm as you recall the last few hours where your life turned around. playing it from the first moment it started that night, no— these last few years. all of that leading up to this shift of light. music means more. life means more, the trees mean more, and god this walk feels so much better than it did yesterday. in fact, you couldn’t even imagine life before his confession. drifting off to sleep never felt so good. living inside of a memory never felt so good.